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Just Desserts Cookbook


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"Desserts. For when times are hard and you need a little pick me up, there’s nothing a little sweet treat can’t fix. They’re good like that.
A strawberry cheesecake will never break your heart, a trifle will never disrespect you and a doughnut will never cheat on you with that bitch Becky from work. Shame the same can’t be said for guys.

So if he’s stood you up, ghosted you, cheated on you, or sent flirty messages to some girl who is “just a friend”, then you deserve WAY better than that lying, inconsiderate piece of shit. Reach for the rolling pin, find the sharpest meat cleaver, dust off the pitchforks, torches and baseball bats (okay, maybe a SLIGHT exaggeration) and get some baking done. That’s right, don’t keep all that shit bottled up while that dickhead has moved onto his next victim (oops, I mean girlfriend – ha!) Instead, express your rage through the medium of baking and create something that will actually make you feel good for a change. Think of his face as you ferociously knead the dough for ‘You A-Hole’ doughnuts, think of the shitty ways he treated you as you bake a Lemon ‘Bastart’ and say good riddance as you tuck into an ‘As Cold as Your Heart’ Ice Cream Sundae. Plus, a good ol’ slice of chocolate ‘Go Fudge Yourself’ cake will be a hell of a lot richer than he’ll ever be!!

He’ll get his just desserts, but in the meantime babe, you enjoy yours!"